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Three sportsmanship tip(offs) from a weekend of basketball

FGCU's Sherwood Brown and teammates
Credit: AP Florida/Michael Perez

Over the weekend, there was about as much basketball as one could hope to watch. Not only was March Madness on up to four channels at once, but our local high school played in the Minnesota state championship. As a transplanted Hoosier, I was in heaven.

It was a weekend of listening to squeaky shoes and watching for examples of sportsmanship. Following are three take-aways from the basketball-full weekend:

1. Drawing attention to sportsmanship issues really does work. On Saturday morning, many hours before the Apple Valley High School basketball team took on Park Center at the Target Center, a Facebook post mentioned that at Thursday’s qualifier, our students turned their backs when the opposing team was announced.

Almost immediately... Continue reading...

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Four reasons we might be to blame for the Steubenville rape


WASHINGTON, DC, March 19, 2013 - On St. Patrick’s Day, a holiday known best for its green beer and corned beef sandwiches, two teenage football players from Steubenville, Ohio were convicted of raping a teenage girl from West Virginia last summer while she was drunk.

The repercussions of these two guilty verdicts shed four unwelcomed lights on how our society is getting it wrong when it comes to preventing violence of this type. 

1. We promote aggression and objectification. Kids are exposed to...  READ MORE...

Abuse in youth sports: Words CAN hurt you




The coach’s spit flew into his seven-year-old victims face: “You’re not tough enough to play football! You’re a pussy! You’ll never amount to anything! Get out of here and don’t bother coming back!” 

The young boy had been quietly standing outside a fence watching his former team practice. He quit the team a few days before because the coach constantly yelled at him (and other kids), but wandered back over to the field just to watch, since that’s where all his friends were.


When the coach spied him, he stopped practice and unleashed the words that would change the boy’s life forever.

It was 1973 and the boy, James T., lived on a military base in Germany because his dad was a military contractor. The team he wanted to be part of, but very soon didn’t, was run by young recruits determined to whip those kids (ages 6-8) into shape.

After all, it was how they, as recruits, been whipped into shape at boot camp.

Abuse isn’t new to sports but the recent high-profile sexual abuse stories have dominated our thinking about it. Unfortunately, in some regions and in certain sports, verbal abuse is seen as commonplace and even a desired way of coaching. In others, it’s seen as the lesser evil type of abuse.


An excerpt:
“Any type of abuse has debilitating consequences both for its victims and for the society as a whole. In the context of athletic programs it lowers the self-esteem and limits the ability of participants to develop their full potential in sports and physical activities. It impairs the future capacity of its victims to experience full athletic participation and to pursue employment and leadership roles in athletics.

This, in turn, deprives the society as a whole of the contributions of these individuals and damages a genuine appreciation of participant’s athletic achievements and contributions.”

Further, the Foundation defines verbal abuse like this:

“Verbal Abuse – The most commonly occurring type of abuse in sports includes 1) name calling, 2) hurtful comments regarding performance, 3) swearing at players or game officials and 4) comments meant to demean a person’s integrity.”

It should come as no surprise that verbal abuse perpetrated against young athletes can have long-term, devastating effects. According to Patricia Evans, author of The Verbally Abusive Relationship and Victory Over Verbal Abuse“No one is more influenced by verbal abuse than a child. The negative impact of verbal abuse on children cannot be measured. Certainly some children succeed who were verbally abused in childhood but are they better people?” 

And that “typical” coach screaming? Not necessary, according to one source in the rugby world. 

In his article, “Verbal Abuse in Sports,” Tim Goodenough, Mental Toughness Specialist for RugbyIQ.com, writes:
“Why screaming sessions mostly don’t work is that the verbal attacks are commenting on the value of the individual, and not their behavior, they are personal and not about the group. The experience of hearing abuse from a trusted source – the coach – in front of the team, is negative enough to not support the player learning anything, other than to not want to have that experience again.”

“Screaming as a style breaks down relationships, a key component in high performance. Fear – often the result of a scream - is a very short-term motivator. Fear can be effective for brief moments of time however over the longer term fear is very seldom effective for high performance. (If ever – I haven’t met an athlete yet who performs at their best by experiencing strong fear).”

James is a case study for how early trauma related to sports can shape a person’s entire life. Now in his mid-forties and a successful professional in the Midwest, James is built like a swimmer and will admit that swimming and running are the only sports in which he truly likes participating. “I was never on a team, though. I never wanted to be. I didn’t want to be the last kid chosen, the fat kid, or the kid who was called out for not being good enough.”

In a society where men are often judged for their ability to be athletes and to talk sports, James shies away from as much of it as possible. “I can hold my own if I have to with clients,” he says of having to converse on sports. “But I don’t buy-in to the importance of sports for kids. Physical activity, yes. But not team sports.”

Four decades later, the abuse James suffered is still painful and evident. And his decision to stay out of sports seems more like a defense mechanism than a true choice. Given his height and build, one wonders if he would have made a good outfielder or forward. Maybe he would have enjoyed coaching.

Maybe his own son would be involved in sports.

James has never been on a team that worked hard to make a play happen, bummed out over a loss, or learned from a compassionate coach who grew men and not just athletes. He never heard his parents cheer him on from the sidelines or felt his friends pat him on the back for making a save.

And he won’t.

All because one coach, forty years ago, abused him so intensely and publicly that he eschewed sports forever. 

Organized youth sports are touted as great places for kids to learn teamwork, responsibility, accountability, and the importance of physical activity. But for some kids, sports are places where they suffer abuse, verbal or otherwise, at the hand of trusted adults, sometimes with the complicity of parents who are as invested in winning as the coaches are.

Experts in the fields of child and sports psychology encourage parents and coaches to make sure kids aren’t treated in a way that, off the team or in general, would be considered abusive. Otherwise, sports will be more detrimental to a child’s self-esteem and future participation in physical activity than not playing organized sports at all.

For more information on how parents can stop verbal abuse in sports, go to www.chillmanager.org.

Read more: http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/chill-manager-sportsmanship-real-world/2013/mar/12/abuse-youth-sports-words-can-hurt-you/#ixzz2NQrCtk6A
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Denny Hamlin: Crosses NASCAR’s line and earns $25,000 fine



Denny Hamlin
Source: Justin Edmonds/Getty Images North America

In racing news, Denny Hamlin, the 32-year old American NASCAR racer considered a superstar by many racing fans, made a mistake last weekend. No, he didn’t tap the brakes, bump a competitor or pass on a yellow flag. Instead, he answered honestly when asked about the new Generation 6 car, the sport’s next greatest thing.

“I don’t want to be the pessimist,” Hamlin said about his #11 Toyota said after the Phoenix race, “but it did not race as good as our Generation-5 cars. This is more like what the Generation-5 was at the beginning. The teams hadn’t figured out how to get the aero balance right. Right now, you just run single file, and you cannot get around the guy in front of you.”

Later, he also said, “I hate to be ‘Denny-downer,’ but I just didn’t pass that many cars today. That’s the realistic fact of it.”
NASCAR officials used the nebulous Section 12-1 prohibiting “actions detrimental to stock car racing” to justify Hamlin’s fine. Although they didn’t reveal exactly which of Hamlin’s words violated the rule, it’s clear they feel he did something wrong. $25,000 worth of something, to be exact.

On the surface, Hamlin’s remarks could be compared to a football player saying, “I don’t think these new helmets fit right yet.” Or, a golfer saying, “These new graphite shafts don’t allow for as much distance off the tee.”

The NASCAR car is integral to the sport, a piece of equipment that not only defines the endeavor, but also has a great deal to do with determining an outcome. But just like an athlete still needs to be a good football player or golfer to succeed, a driver still has to be a good driver regardless of what car he’s driving. Hamlin’s stats indicate that he is a top-notch driver.

But what’s under the surface of all this drama over what seems like a minor criticism of new equipment? Chris Riley, a Michigan native and NASCAR fan for over 30 years, thinks he knows: “Anybody that’s been watching NASCAR for any length of time can tell you that the new car isn’t racing very well yet.

“I’m sure it will eventually, but for now it needs work. NASCAR as a sanctioning body is very protective of its ‘brand.’ They’ve suffered some losses in spectator gate and television revenues over the last few years and they basically have a ‘zero tolerance’ policy about anybody that criticizes the on-track product or the sanctioning body itself.”

Another NASCAR fan, Craig Hassis, who lives in California and follows the sport closely, said, “I understand protecting the business. I just don’t agree on their [NASCAR’s] selective nature on who gets fined and why. Other drivers have said the racing and the cars need work, too”

Maybe not so publicly, though.

Imbalanced relationships, whether they are between partners, friends, employers/employees, or coaches/mentees, are far more detrimental than the perceived loss of power a more equalized relationship would create.

The CHILL Manager program, a sportsmanship education and training system, identifies bullying as a direct cause of poor sportsmanship (entities attempting to maintain control) and also one of the most damaging effects of it (trickle-down abuse, unhealthy cultural norms, declining sport/activity participation).

In this case, by citing Hamlin for poor sportsmanship, NASCAR’s system of damage- and reputation-control appears to have had the opposite effect. Rather than keeping Hamlin on-script, the fine has galvanized at least one driver (Hamlin) to publicly buck the system. 

From Hamlin’s Twitter feed: “…I believe the simple fact of us not even having a conversation about this issue before I was hit with a fine has something to say about our relationship….I am a person that worked very hard from the BOTTOM to get where I am today and someone telling me that I can[‘t] [sic] give my 100 percent honest opinion really bothers me….

“I feel as if today NASCAR lost one of its biggest supporters vocally of where our sport is headed. So in the end there are no winners. I said today I would not pay the fine. I stand by that and will go through the process of appealing. Trust me, this is not about the money…It’s much deeper.”

So what came first? Did “bullying” by the organization (to keep mum about the Gen 6’s current limitations) cause Hamlin’s poor sportsmanship or did Hamlin’s attempt to control his freedom of expression cause NASCAR’s?

Sportsmanship in the real world includes honor among teammates, respect for coaches and mentors and respect for opponents. Sportsmanship is about creating and maintaining a positive relationship between all participants in a sport. But no organization is immune from poor sportsmanship, and ultimately bullying, from the top down, especially if no one challenges the negativity.

At least one thing Hamlin said holds a universal truth. This goes much deeper than a mildly critical statement about a brand new product (Windows 8, anyone?). This situation speaks to an imbalance in a sport that relies on balance to succeed.

What are your thoughts about the Hamlin fine? Leave your comments below.


Read more: http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/chill-manager-sportsmanship-real-world/2013/mar/8/denny-hamlin-crosses-nascars-line-and-earns-25000-/#ixzz2NMJKcETr
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Flacco’s $120.6M deal perpetuates unrealistic fable


The U.S. is in a time of budget cuts, reduced social services, and high unemployment. Some professional athletes aren’t feeling that hurt, however, as evidenced by quarterback Joe Flacco’s $120.6/six year deal with the Baltimore Ravens.
By Keith Allison (originally posted to Flickr as Joe Flacco)
[CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)],
via Wikimedia Commons

Or are they?

According to Billy Corben’s 2012 documentary, 30 for 30: Broke, professional athletes are burning through their money faster than they can earn it. The film cites a Sports Illustrated report that revealed that 78% of former NFL players have gone bankrupt or are financially stressed after two years of retirement. Given that the average NFLcareer lasts just under three and a half years, that’s a wide swing from nothing, to everything, to nothing again in a short period of time.

The NBA isn’t much better. According to the same SI report, 60% of former NBA players are broke within five years of retirement.

One thing that lures kids and their parents into chasing the holy grail of sports is the hope of fortune. Who wouldn’t want a chance to score several or a hundred million dollars for a few years of work? It sounds like a dream come true, almost like winning the lottery. In fact, professional athletes who receive enormous contracts are often compared to lottery winners because of their quick and excessive spending.

True, the chances of winning a big-money lottery are lower than cashing in on a spectacular sports career, but not by a number that means very much. Each year, though, kids set their sights on being pro ball players and their parents do, too. According to the NCAA, in 2012 there were approximately 308,000 high school seniors playing football. From that pool, there were just over 17,000 NCAA freshman positions. Of that group, each year only 250-260 college athletes are drafted into the NFL. That gives a high school football player a .0008% chance of going pro.

Let’s say the high schooler is still completely convinced of his ability to play pro football. The average NFL salary is about $1.9 million a year. That’s the average, though. When you add in salaries like Joe Flacco’s new deal, that means a lot of guys are making a lot less than the average.

Despite the reality that most professional athletes make far less than we’re led to believe through commercials and lifestyles, families are still willing to sacrifice everything to get that ultimate paycheck. 

Often, families hire trainers, send their kids to exclusive camps, buy them the best equipment, and otherwise pay for the chance to make it in the big show.

However, as Billy Corben’s film shows, that ultimate paycheck is a fable for all but a handful of players. Not only does the income potential not last long, because of injuries and sports politics, but many professional athletes are unprepared for instant millionaire status and tend to spend unwisely, ultimately leading to the high number of bankruptcies cited by Sports Illustrated. By offering contracts like Flacco’s, sports franchises are sending out a siren song to kids who would be better served by studying and choosing a career with more longevity.

Now would be a great time for parents to save money on personal trainers. Instead, they can focus their kids on long-term academic achievement over long-shot Hail Marys. In the end, kids’ expectations of themselves will be more realistic and they will have a great chance of success in their (second) favorite career.

CHILL Manager is now being posted at The Washington Times Communities.